Where to start?

I have tried to blog several times, but never seem to get very far. Like everything in my life lately, I start and then drift off adding more junk in my closet. I keep planning on cleaning my closet and moving on, but something always stops me. That something is FEAR. I am so afraid to live life that I am missing out on life. Here I sit, safe and secure inside my house pretending to live. What kind of example am I making for my children? They too live their lives safely inside the house. That's not what I want them to do. I need to get up and start living so my children don't end up like me. Lonely, lost and depressed. Existing not living. The last year has been strange for us, but that's no excuse. I need to lean how to live life again.